Riaan 
Njengoba sonke isazi-mlando saseRoma kanye nomlandeli kaShakespeare azi, isangoma sake satshela uKhesari ukuthi aqaphele Ides ka-March, ngoba ngalolo suku kwakuyokwenzeka izinto ezimnyama nezesabekayo. Ngithanda ukucabanga ukuthi umlayezo ubuhloselwe mina, futhi, ngoba namuhla, inkampani yami yenethiwekhi engenantambo ebiza kancane, i-Mint Mobile, ipakishe isitayela sayo sokuxhumana esixakayo, ubunikazi bayo bosaziwayo, kanye nezinhlelo zayo zama-$15/ngenyanga… zithengisele zonke ku-T-Mobile $1.35 billion.
Kuhle kumlingisi uRyan Reynolds, ongumnikazi weMint Mobile. Njengoba Reynolds kusho isitatimende, “Sijabule kakhulu ukuthi i-T-Mobile ihlule ibhidi elinolaka ngomzuzu wokugcina elivela kumama wami u-Tammy Reynolds njengoba sikholelwa ukuthi ubuhle benethiwekhi yabo ye-5G kuzohlinzeka ngokulingana kwamasu okungcono kunamakhono ama-mahjong kamama angaphezulu kancane kwesilinganiso.” (Ha-ha!) UReynolds naye wakhulula i ividiyo yokutholwa ehlekisayo Ngake ngabona.
Noma kunjalo, izindaba ziyadabukisa. I-Mint yazizwa isha; kwakuyinkampani yenethiwekhi engenantambo enewebhusayithi ehlakaniphile nohlelo lokusebenza olungisebenzele (okungenani kimi) kalula futhi ngaphandle komthungo, isitayela esingahloniphi futhi esiqondile (uReynolds uthunyelwe ama-tattoos obuso bakhe kwababhalisile ngoKhisimusi; bathi, “No Ragrets”), futhi amanani amakhulu. Konke Kuvele Kusebenze™. Manje, ngithanda inani elihle, kodwa hhayi ngezindleko zesevisi ye-janky, i-hiccups eqhubekayo, namawebhusayithi enkathi ye-2000 njengoba ngibone kwabanye abahlinzeki beselula abashibhile. Futhi kwakungemina kuphela; I-Mint ihlanganise izincomo eziningi, okuhlanganisa “isabelomali esingcono kakhulu” inketho engenantambo evela I-Wirecutter.
Ngakho-ke u-Mint wazizwa ekhethekile—egxile kumakhasimende futhi exakile esikhundleni sebhizinisi futhi engenamphefumulo—kodwa-ke inkampani bekuwumdlalo nje wokutholwa ophethwe eduze, okusalindwe ukugunyazwa ngokomthetho, manje usuzotholwa yi-“Un-Carrier.” UBlargh.
Kuyahlekisa! Kodwa, uyazi, futhi uhlobo oludabukisayo.
Angingedwa ozizwa ngale ndlela. Ezimweni ezishaqisayo, ngifunde amazwana angezansi kwesimemezelo sevidiyo ye-YouTube futhi angizange ngiphelelwe ithemba ngekusasa lesintu. (Ngiqonde, I wenza, kodwa ikakhulukazi ngenxa yokutholwa hhayi ngoba “i-meatbot2576” ibhale imisho eqhubekayo ngaphandle kokhefana kuzo zonke izinhlamvu ezincane.) Amazwana angu-10 okuqala engawafunda ayemunye esikhalazweni sawo sokuthi enye into enhle nejabulisayo nengeyona eyesabekayo empilweni izoba khona. kutholwe ku-blobosphere yebhizinisi. Isampula:
“Njengekhasimende le-Mint Mobile, angijabulile ngalesi simemezelo. Ngokutholwa okufana nalokhu, kuyindaba nje yesikhathi ngaphambi kokuba izintengo zikhuphuke, ikhwalithi yehle, futhi yonke into eyenza inkampani encane ibe mkhulu iphelile.”
“Noooooo. Bengiyikhasimende le-T-mobile iminyaka embalwa, futhi ngashintshela ku-Mint ngokuqondile ukuze ngibaleke ku-T-mobile. Lokhu kufana nokushiya ubuhlobo obuhlukumezayo ukuze nje uthole usonhlalakahle wakho endaweni ephephile ashayele umlingani wakho okuhlukumezayo. ngizokulanda.”
“Hhayi-ke, ahamba amanani esiwajwayele sonke. Uma ukholelwa ukuthi uTmobile ngeke ashintshe yonke into EKUGCINENI bese enyusa amanani uyahlanya….zonke izinto ezinhle ziyaphela. Muhle umsebenzi uRyan ngokudayisa ngaphandle!”
“Ngiyazi ukuthi angimazi uRyan mathupha futhi ngiyazi ukuthi bekuwubulima ukuthatha ithuba enkampanini yocingo entsha ngoba insizwa enothando yangitshela ukuthi …. Kodwa angikwazi ukuzibamba kodwa ngizizwa ngikhashelwe. Bengicabanga ukuthi ukhashelwe. empeleni usaziwayo owayebakhathalela abantu futhi efuna ukusebenzisa ingcebo yakhe ngokunenzuzo. Ukuba nohlelo lwefoni oluthengekayo kwaba nomthelela omkhulu omuhle empilweni yami…”
“Mina nomyeni siphatheke kabi. Besikuthanda ukuthi bekuyinkampani encane engenazintambo. Besikuthanda ukusekela i-Mint Mobile. Sithande isu lokumaketha likaRyan Reynold. Ake sibone ukuthi izintengo zehle isikhathi esingakanani ngaphambi kokuba izintengo zehle nekhwalithi yehle.”
“Ngokungafani nezinkampani ezinkulu ezingenazintambo esizitholayo esikhundleni sokuthola izinkampani ezincane emzamweni wokudala ukuzimela.”
“Ngiyethemba ngempela ukuthi uRyan uqala enye inkampani yocingo, ngangiyithanda i-Mint, ngokwengxenye yemiyalezo ‘yobudedengu’, futhi ngokwengxenye yombono ophelele wokungabi namali efihliwe, uhlelo lwesabelomali nje olusebenza ngesabelomali.”
“Angijabulile ngalesi sigameko. Sonke sizobe sivakashela le vidiyo yenjabulo futhi sibeke amazwana ngokunengeka eminyakeni engu-2 lapho sikhokha imali ephindwe kabili ngohlelo olufanayo kanye ‘nenzuzo’ eyengeziwe ka-T- Isevisi yamakhasimende ehlakaniphile yeselula. Bengikwethemba, Deadpool!”
“Yini into embi kakhulu engenzeka eMelika? Ukuhlanganiswa kwamandla ezinkampani. Ukuncika kwezinketho zangempela esinazo, kuzolimaza kakhulu umthengi. Lokhu kuyadumaza kakhulu.”
“Kuthengiswa nge… $1.35 billion??? Cishe ividiyo ye-YouTube ejabulisa kakhulu uRyan ake ayithumela.”
Reynolds, uma kungenjalo ukuphatha iqembu lakhe lebhola lezinyawo laseWales nokuqala phakathi amafilimu amaqhawe anomlomo ongcolile, uzohlala endimeni yakhe kwaMint. Futhi i-Mint izoqhubeka nokusebenza njengeyunithi ehlukile ngaphakathi kwe-T-Mobile. Futhi, inkampani igcina uhlelo lwayo luka-$15 ngenyanga. (Okwamanje.) Futhi i-Mint yayihlala iyinhlangano nje Umthengisi we-MVNO yesevisi ye-T-Mobile. Ngakho-ke mhlawumbe konke kuhamba kahle, futhi eminyakeni kusukela manje sizobheka emuva ngohleko ngokwesaba kwethu okuyindida. Mhlawumbe sonke sizoyithanda i-Un-Carrier. Mhlawumbe ngizofaka mina mathupha isikibha esiphinki futhi ngimemezele uthando lwami lwe-T-Mobile/Mint ophahleni. Kodwa kunzima ukukholelwa ukuthi, ngenkokhelo yayo enkulu yezezimali ezuziwe, i-Mint ngeke iguqule ezinye zezinto eziyenze yaba yinhle kakhulu.
Impilo kuyinto shintsha, kunjalo. (Ngaphandle kwengxenye yempilo ehilela ukukhononda ngoshintsho. Lokho akuguquki.) Kodwa lokho akusho ukuthi kufanele ngikuthande. Futhi kanye, nginabahlaziyi be-YouTube ohlangothini lwami.
